Core Beliefs

These are the core beliefs of the Guzmer religion/cult.

Formalities

Guzbye

Although not considered a sin, one who neglects to say Guzbye will receive the TERMINATED role. Anyone who witnesses this act is encouraged to report it to an admin and they will receive the Thought Police role.

Excessively Long URLs

When sharing links in the Discord server, care should be given to post the URL in it's shortest form. Many websites (especially e-commerce sites) add extra parameters to the URL for the purpose of tracking. These extra parameters should be stripped away, lest you want to be ridiculed by other members. If it's an Amazon link, Guzmer Bot will also insult you, while posting the correct shortened link.

Sex

We have few beliefs on sex as that is a personal matter. However, we believe Guzmer wants us to:

Do hand and mouth stuff as a form of birth control
Limit yourself to only one cheesy roll-up per week
Have fun

Pretending to be Canadian

It is explicitly banned.

Cover-ups and Conspiracies

Ursa Minor

A core tenet of the Guzmer ideology is that the constellation Ursa Minor (better known by its North American name, the Little Dipper) does not exist. This can be proven by observing the night sky at any time of the year and seeing that it is never visible. It is a common belief of the simple-minded masses that the Little Dipper does exist, but this is an easily debunked lie that has been propagated by evil government forces for reasons that are currently unknown.